I was sitting in the classroom 
Trying to look intelligent 
In case the teacher looked at me 
She was long and she was lean 
She's a middle-aged dream 
And that lady means the whole world to me 
 
It's a natural achievement 
Conquering my homework 
With her image pounding in my brain 
She's an inspiration 
For my graduation 
And she helps to keep the classroom sane 
 
Oh teacher I need you like a little child 
You got something in you to drive a schoolboy wild 
You give me education in the lovesick blues 
Help me get straight come out and say 
Teacher I, teacher I, teacher I, Teacher I need you 
 
I have to write a letter 
Tell about my feelings 
Just to let her know the scene 
Focus my attention 
On some further education 
In connection with the birdies and the bees 
 
So I'm sitting in the classroom 
I'm looking like a zombie 
I'm waiting for the bell to ring 
I've got John Wayne stances 
I've got Erroll Flynn advances 
And it doesn't mean a doggoned thing