If you were in my movie 
I'd have you as the doctor 
Small black bag 
And a big black coat 
 
I'd have you make a house call 
To the woman 
You could lay your 
Diagnostic hand 
Upon her belly and her throat 
 
If you were in my movie 
You could be the detective 
You could sit behind the desk 
With a question on your lip 
 
Examine her for motive 
Investigate the scene 
In the ever present danger 
Keep the holster at your hip 
 
If you were in my movie 
If you were in my movie 
If you were in my movie 
 
If you were in my movie 
You could be the priest 
Long black frock 
White collar at the neck 
 
You could come to the confession 
You could give a girl a thrill 
You could save her from her passion 
Keep her body in check 
 
If you were in my movie 
If you were in my movie 
If you were in my movie 
 
If you were in my movie 
You could be the gangster 
Double-breasted pinstriped 
Man with the cigarette 
 
Go running down the alley 
With a double-crossing blond 
Explaining to the jury 
That you hadn't done anything yet 
 
If you were in my movie...